How’s that for an oxymoron?

It all started when Bryce suggested coerced me into going hiking at a place called Koko Head stairs.  I don’t even like the stairmaster at the gym so why I agreed to go I’ll never know.  It could have been his bubbling excitement.  I like making people happy.  I like making Bryce happy.  But NO MORE!  I kid… maybe.

He warned me to hydrate from the beginning of the day so I started drinking water as soon as I woke up.  As a result, I had to use the bathroom a lot.  By the time we were leaving I was sick of water (and peeing – sorry, couldn’t help it).  Plus, I kind of had butterflies in my tummy from the nervousness of what we were about to do.  Hike.  And not an easy trail either.

The trail is an endless set of “stairs” going up a mountain.  The stairs aren’t well maintained and neither is the foliage that surrounds it.  Here’s a picture I snapped from the bottom when I was still breathing.

The beginning is not too bad… but once you hit a certain point, the mountain gets incredible steep and scary.  And see that handy dandy rope along the right side?  That’s for people like me who may need a little extra help.  No seriously, people have been airlifted out of here.

Here’s a close-up of the trail.  You can see that some of the wood is deteriorating and just look at all that grass that can trip clumsy people like me…  I took this picture on one of the many stops we had to take so I wouldn’t topple off the side or downwards.  I would have taken a few people for a roll with me if I fell down.

By the way, there are crazy people who do this trail.  There was a man we saw as we were going up who was coming down and on our way down, he was going back up.  There was a woman who was jogging up (oh yeah did I mention people run up and down here??) and every few steps she would start going down again and then head back up.  Crazy.

I didn’t actually reach the top (not even the promise of the beautiful view was enough to keep me going).  I consider it a failure on my part because I could have gone.  I was just a big chicken.  Here’s reason number one:

This bridge is the scariest things I’ve ever done in my life.  There are no railings and you’re only walking on planks of wood.  If you don’t step carefully, you can fall.  Side note:  I asked Bryce if I would die when I fell and he said, “No but you could be seriously injured.”  How’s that for keeping it real?  I tell you, he’s so encouraging.  Anyway, going up was hard.  But coming down?  Terrifying.  My momentum made me go way faster than I wanted to and I only had the soles of my shoes to brace myself.  Besides, I also had the added pressure of hurrying up because some idiot behind me kept getting close to me.  Two people would not be able to walk here side by side and it looked to me like people had the courtesy of waiting for you to finish before going.  Bryce was no help whatsoever either.  He kept trying to encourage me by saying things like “You’re almost there, keep going.”  When I looked, I was SO not almost there.  Just so you know, boys are dumb.

We went around 4:00 p.m. to ensure I would not be walking down in the dark and I was hoping to have the added bonus of the temperature cooling down.  Boy was I wrong.  It was HOT.  I felt woozy half way up.  And I was not a happy camper.  My face was flaming red (at least I assume it was because it sure felt like it was on fire).  Turns out all that water I drank didn’t do much for me.  I don’t know if I just peed it all out or what, but I was definitely dehydrated.  However, I kept going for quite a while actually because I’m a trooper.  Bryce was a good sport about it all, which I was grateful for since we didn’t make it to the top and we were going really slow for him.  He used to do this once a week a little while ago but stopped because of school work, so he’s used to it all.  In fact, dude can run down (and possibly up?) the mountain.  Or at least he can jog.

I decided enough was enough when we came to the steepest part of the mountain.  Cue in reason number two.  I needed my legs to get back down after all.  Once we actually got down, my legs were super wobbly.  And one of the dogs I saw earlier?  He ran past me.  Yeah.  Awesome.  Needless to say, it’s a good thing Bryce lives nearby because I was so ready to drench myself in cold water and drink ice cold water.  My headache was pretty bad that night and only The Great Mouse Detective and sleep cured it.  🙂

But hey, the view wasn’t so bad from where I was.  There’s Hanauma Bay!  I wanted to jump off the mountain and fly straight into the ocean but Bryce said he didn’t think I’d make it.

And you know what?  I tried something new and I survived!  If there’s a next time, I will push myself to make it to the top and hopefully make it back down…  We shall see!  Bryce is already ready to go again with me.

Me?  Not so much.